Wednesday, February 27, 2008

The Day London Shook in Fear!

Ok, so the title is a bit extreme, but I'm guessing what the UK tabloids will be blaring on their front page tomorrow--England, including the London and Cambridge area, did suffer a modest earthquake around 1am last night, but most people slept through it. We did.

On to more important news. My favorite story today is this one about an English aristocrat named Benjamin Slade who is using DNA testing to find an heir for his fortune, which includes a rather large mansion. Here's an outrageous excerpt outlining some of his concerns about who can be his heir:

"I have said that drug-takers are out, which upset the people of Amsterdam where the entire population seems to be on drugs," he explained. "I have also said that I don't want a communist, because they would give it all away and because I don't think Stalin was any good, or Castro.

"I don't want homosexuals, because they don't breed. I don't want Guardian readers, because this is a Guardian-free household. Independent readers are marginal.

"I had an email from Papua New Guinea and sent them a reply. I'd rather like to go there, although there aren't any Slades in Papua New Guinea, but I do worry about getting eaten or speared. So I sent them an email saying, 'Do your women have bones in their noses and if they have them how then can I give them a bit of tonguey?

Oh my! Is it April Fool's Day already? The funniest part. This story was in the Independent, whose readers, according to Slade, are "marginal".--jt

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